Pain dissection is a very alluring topic in today’s world because the process of healing is more intense than the sensibility to pain. There are so many times that we are hurt and end up with sore moods. But have you ever thought that this very mood swing of ours can be a co-dependence of our minds to pain?
Hello, welcome back today we shall discover circumstances that our brain creates itself to let the tears out. Which is good!
Be it bad results, fight with friends and family, a heartbreak or work stress. We often find ourselves more into situations that make us cranky and agitated rather than chirpy and joyful. No one can have only good days, because there would be no essence in that. Tough smiles and laughter are contagious but if you are one of those people who often questions “why are they so happy all the time?” then my friend, you are in the right place.
Now it is a known fact that Endorphins are the key ingredient when a person is happy all day. It’s the recipe to their nature. Although most of the times people are attracted to joyful people, there is a dark mystery with the ones that appear sad. Even vulnerable.
Although the sight of tears may get some attention from others, the smell of the tears has a different story to tell.
According to research, the Smithsonian magazine 2012 published a study where they collected tear samples from women and placed these samples under the noses of men. It was reported that the tears did not elicit empathy instead it decreased the number of testosterone levels in men. In short, the tears sent a message that romance was off the table.
Yet somehow, our lives voluntarily revolve around the conjecture of pain, empathy and joy. Why?
Well, the answer is simple. We are dependent on the sad feeling, much likely as it enhances the gratification we receive next for the joys.
Sometimes, it is observed that people abide by pain and suffering as they believe that suffering will eventually bring happiness. In this stance of fallacy, they create situations to deliberately hurt themselves. Sometimes emotionally and sometimes physically. This often is a behavioural notion in more individuals than we know.
Ever thought why you keep craving attention from people you know don’t care? Sounds familiar, isn’t it? Yep. We have all been there. This is a classic example of craving for some blues.
The thing is that this circle of life is natural. Bouncing back from events of lives, learning lessons the hard way or not learning from them at all, unless you have made the same mistake twice. Maybe even thrice. But what should you watch out for is going ahead and looking for blues?
Things take time, everything happening around you is an integral result of everything you have been doing over the days you have lived so far. You can control your today, to make your tomorrow better, but you cannot make changes in your future by scattering your energy around craving for blues. The need for pain in every individual is at its very minimal amount, and that shall remain that way. Just because you want to create a sense of seclusion is not enough justification for you to look out for troubles.
If you are happy now, remain happy. Plan your tomorrow. Don’t stress about it, because when you do so, the energy you should be investing in today’s task is wasted.
For people who are recovering from depression, there are circumstances that they face when they have thoughts that would otherwise seem irrational to their self. They go in search of pain because something more hurtful than to what they are already feeling gives a sense of relaxation. Imagine it like, having a broken finger by accident and then breaking your leg too. The entire attention shifts in healing the leg so the finger feels fine. But isn’t the broken limb an exaggeration of you wanting more pain? In the end, it all works out in two ways. Either you end up making yourself better out of it. Or you end up spoiling whatever you have. Which side you want to reside is entirely your choice.
5 things you should do to help yourself:
- Check your Patterns.
Logically, we always work in patterns. Check for yours. What are we looking for? The line where you suddenly crave to talk to that one person you know will distort your peace, or do that one activity that will make you unhappy. Or re-visit some test you took you failed in.it could be anything.
How to avoid it? Do that one thing that makes you happy. It could be watching a movie. Talking to a friend or playing with your pet dog.
- Adopt a cactus.
Although it might sound weird, Cactuses have a very important message to give. They are low maintenance. You need to water them just once a week or so, (well most of them) and they stay green always. Think of yourself as same. Guarded but soft, crave for very little attention and care from others because you, my friend, are SELF SUFFICIENT
- Make a playlist and dance it out.
Music can be one of the greatest distractions and healer at the same time. Not in the mood for lyrics, switch to English classical. In the mood to dance out your frustration play the most energizing loud song you know! Keep this music segregated so that you can reach it directly when you wish to.
- Cut vegetables
Trust me on this, it’s no culinary wish of mine but a very useful tactic. When we cut vegetables all the mind wandering stops. Because it is the task at hand and needs to be attended well or else you might cut yourself. Try it, definitely works.
- Plan your days
There are so many routes we take if we don’t have ourselves organized, and if you are currently having hard times I suggest you start immediately. Once you have your entire day planned out, the urge to tick those events off will take your mind off things that are unproductive and otherwise hurtful too. There are a dozen tools available both online offline for organizing yourself. Try some basic apps if purchasing things is a commitment you cant make. If you wish to go get it, start journaling. You will thank me later for it.
So, when do you think should we stop this dependence on pain? How about NOW!